7.19.2013

Lost and Lonely

I find myself typing words that I commonly share to others personally, either via SNS or thru phone calls and messages.

Due to rapid changes in my life recently and never-ending activities that make me dead tired, I wasn't able to update this one channel I have. And now, I see myself alone.

Don't get me wrong. I am literally not alone. It's the emptiness within me that makes me feel such. I've already expressed this a number of times to a handful of friends that I could confide to. They gave me various responses to this dilemma that I have. Yes, I tried them; they made me feel ok, but only for a short time.

If only there was an available Lactulose for such emotion then I would have probably bought it already from the nearest pharmacy.

I see myself standing in a long, dark, and winding road, with no one beside me. I am alone in this journey. Yes, I have braved the previous walks for me to be able to be in my current position, but I do not know if I still have the capacity to move forward without someone guiding me.

I have friends and family to confide to but I don't think they're pretty much enough to make me move even just an inch from where I am right now. No, I am not losing hope that they would make me do so, but I think this is far from the filial touch that I have.

I do know how to read route maps and compasses but currently, I do not possess any, nor do I have a GPS on-hand. If only I have a guide to where I am supposed to be then everything will be easier.

I am longing for that helping hand to safe me from this misery. I do not want to be stuck in this situation for long. I am not good handling depression and loneliness that's why I have to get out from this road immediately.

I just don't know how.

No comments: